My 8-year-old son has a Ray Rice jersey.

The son of a lifelong Los Angeles/St. Louis Rams fan, he got the jersey when he was 6 and the Baltimore Ravens were making their run to the Super Bowl XLVII championship. It was big on him when he got it so he could wear it for some time.

Roger Goodell's decide-now-and-listen-to-reason-later policy on domestic violence still suspect

It still fits him today.

My son did not see the gruesome video that TMZ.com released of Rice hitting and knocking out then-fiancé Janay Palmer inside an elevator at a now-closed Atlantic City casino in February. He knows Ray Rice hit his fiancé and was suspended for two games from the NFL. He does not know his favorite player is now out of the NFL.

NFL's leniency toward Ray Rice because of wife's pleas?

Nor will my son ever wear his Ray Rice jersey again.

His father has been one of the reporters following the Rice saga, making the initial report of the domestic violence incident for Sports World News.

The story was of special interest to me because of the role Rice played with my son. I must admit; each time I typed the words, "domestic violence" in connection with every Rice story I reported, I never stopped to envision or imagine what "domestic violence" looked like.

Today, I'm sick over what I saw and am down on myself for not stopping to imagine what domestic violence looks like. I am grateful to TMZ.com for opening my eyes. For opening a lot of people's eyes.

ESPN analyst Herm Edwards was the one I heard who articulated accurately why the Baltimore Ravens cut him immediate and why the NFL suspended him indefinitely after the new video of Rice hitting Palmer went public.

He said the TMZ video indeed put an image to what domestic violence looks like. The Ravens discovered what it looked like and dismissed a player it had it every intention of welcoming back after the team's Thursday night game against the Pittsburgh Steelers.

TMZ reported that an NFL spokesman said, "We requested from law enforcement any and all information about the incident, including the video from inside the elevator. That video was not made available to us and no one in our office has seen it until today."

The timeline of the NFL's actions toward Rice, however, are curious. Last month, out of nowhere, Commissioner Roger Goodell said the league "didn't get it right" when it handed Rice a two-game suspension for his actions.

It could be purely coincidence that the video just happened to come out shortly after Goodell had a change of heart. The only comments we have to go on are the comments from the NFL that no one saw the second video.

But if the NFL knew a second video existed, then it should have suspended Rice indefinitely in the first place, until it knew what was on that second video. If it was truly trying to be proactive, the NFL should have commissioned TMZ to gain access to the video if it couldn't.

I also admit that at one point after the NFL announced the two-game suspension for Rice whether the NFL had seen more footage of what happened that led to the leniency.

TMZ asked why the NFL didn't ask the casino for the video:

"It's interesting the NFL says the police wouldn't give them the video ... but the league makes no mention of attempting the get the video from the casino itself."

Which leads us to believe that's what TMZ did, though it is also curious how long it took TMZ to obtain the second video after securing the first.

ESPN reported that some businesses in or near Baltimore are accepting returns of Ray Rice jerseys, and donations will be made to support women victims of domestic abuse.

My son and I have to find out if any such offers are available thousands of miles away from Baltimore, where we live.

I hope he won't be exposed to the video until he's mature enough to understand the severity of Rice's actions. But he will be told why he never will wear that jersey again.

My hope is that my son will learn something that I will never forget when I hear or write about domestic violence.

I also hope that we all remember what domestic violence looks like when it is mentioned.